The car moments

Car rides are unique spaces where the most sincere and deep conversations often emerge. These moments can become opportunities to connect with our children when we least expect it.

There is something magical about car rides. I don’t know if it’s because we’re all confined to a small space, or because we don’t look each other directly in the face, or simply because there are no other distractions. But it’s in the car where the most honest conversations usually happen.

Sometimes, when there are no devices, our children in the car can tell us many things. They can talk about their day, their worries, things that never came up at other times. And when those moments arise, we must learn to take advantage of them.

Not always, of course. Sometimes we’re in a hurry, or thinking about a thousand things, or they’re glued to the tablet. But when we turn off the music, when we put aside devices, when we simply drive and talk... something special happens.

These moments can’t be forced. We can’t say "now tell me about your day" and expect it to work. They are moments that arise when you least expect them. That’s why we need to be available. We need to be present.

Sometimes it’s not even necessary to talk. Sharing the silence of the ride, looking out the window together, singing a song they like. These are also forms of connection.

This month I suggest being more attentive to the small everyday moments. Those that seem insignificant but can be opportunities for connection. The drive to the beach, the ride to campus, bath time, while preparing dinner, or when we’re getting ready for bed. These are moments we have every day and that, if we are present, can become magical.

Because you don’t always need big plans to connect with our children. Sometimes a car ride and our full attention are enough.